Saccharine Spring

Random things I've contemplated, thought was cool, or stuff i've made myself

One year after I realized I was aro, I wrote this. I had the thoughts bumping around my brain for a while and writing it down helped relieve the pestering thoughts. If it wasn’t obvious I don’t write for myself often. The tree “analogy” doesn’t work quite well I think but writing down my feelings directly/literally feels cringe so oh well

"there's a ubiquitous tree everyone talks about chopping. you hear this so absurdly often, naturally you believe, one day, you too would have to chop down a tree.
At some point you believe you’ve found your tree.
Following what you've seen before, you attempt to plan how to cut the tree down, yet you never took action. This too was seen in others, so you wrote it off as normal.
Obviously, you could recognize whenever the chopping occurred for someone else, but personally never felt a strong need to actually act on it. The process didn't make complete sense, but you didn't worry too much. One day as they all say, one day it will all click.
Many years later, an epiphany struck. You never had a tree to chop down and maybe there will never be a tree. The possibility was mind-blowing. Hitting the adjacent weeds and tall grass, for what you knew at the time, was hitting the bark. “Somehow, it’s here, whether you can describe it or not.” Confusing. You never thought so deeply about the tree until this epiphany. In retrospect, your reactions towards the tree differed from others.
Maybe you never need to achieve this goal. You lived all this time perfectly fine without it.
Feeling about not feeling something".



page background is the album cover of clepsydra by chouchou merged syrups & custom cursor from - https://ko-fi.com/s/5091eebb9c